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  • In my Dating and Communication course, my students often talk about how the nature of dating has changed. It seems that, for many young people, dating is more myth than reality. That is, for many individuals, a relationship happens like this: you find someone, hook up with him/her, if it’s enjoyable it continues, and after hooking up for a while, you may start a relationship. This is quite the change from traditional courtship. I don’t say this to be judgmental, and I recognize that this trajectory cannot be applied to everyone—but still, this is a pattern for some people.

    Whether or not the above pattern applies to you, unplanned sexual hookups happen with strangers or, in this case, newly found friends. The question then becomes, "What features surround this hookup?" I will review some of the findings from Paul and Hayes, who studied individuals’ hookup experiences (I recommend that you consult the complete study as space constraints do not allow for a full discussion of their wo

    Eshbaugh, E. M., & Gute, G. (2008). Hookups and sexual regret among college women. The Journal of Social Psychology, 148(1), 77-90.

    Galperin, A., Haselton, M. G., Frederick, D. A., Poore, J., von Hippel, W., Buss, D. M., & Gonzaga, G. C. (2013). Sexual regret: Evidence for evolved sex differences. Archives of Sexual Behavior, 42(7), 1145-1161.

    Owen, J., Quirk, K., & Fincham, F. (2013). Toward a more complete understanding of reactions to hooking up among college women. Journal of Sex & Marital Therapy, (ahead-of-print).

    Oswalt, S. B., Cameron, K. A., & Koob, J. J. (2005). Sexual regret in college students. Archives of Sexual Behavior, 34(6), 663-669.

    Paul, E. L., & Hayes, K. A. (2002). The casualties of casual sex: A qualitative exploration of the phenomenology of college students' hookups. Journal of Social and Personal Relationships, 19(5), 639-661.

    Strokoff, J., Owen, J., & Fincham, F. D. (2014). Diverse reactions to hooking up a

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